Hiring in-home care for your aging parents can benefit you and them in obvious and aging significant ways, but there are also some surprising benefits that can have a lasting impact down the road. For most of us, making arrangements for our aging parents is a learn-as-you-go process. We’ve never done this sort of thing before. There’s a crash course on the new lingo involved, you’re not even exactly sure what they need (and what they don’t), and all these decisions bring with them their own associated costs.
One of the most helpful things to remember as you begin on this caregiving journey is that the term ‘caregiving’ is a very broadly used term that encompasses an entire spectrum of services and personnel. For some it may mean nothing more than a once-a-week visit to check on your parents’ well-being; for others, it may represent 24/7 care by a rotating staff of medically-trained specialists. The in-home caregiving options are literally endless.
However, at Mom’s Best Friend, what we’ve discovered from our many, many years of coming alongside families walking through this process is that the most important task at hand transcends the logistics of caregiving and what really truly matters is finding the right person or team that works best with your loved one. The comings and goings and to-do lists can be worked out; it is the blending of personalities and the development of trusting relationships with all parties involved that has always been our top priority.
What to Look For
Determining whether or not in-home care is, in fact, needed is usually a process. You notice a few things ‘different’ about one, maybe both parents, but nothing by itself is too alarming. You can rationalize a few memory lapses, but are they getting more and more frequent? You notice what seems to be a slightly diminished mental or physical state, but hey, isn’t that normally what happens when you get older? As for their appetite, they hardly seem to want any of their old favorites these days. Is it just a slowing or their metabolism or is there more to it?
Unfortunately, there’s no one-size-fits-all checklist of events or behaviors that answers the questions of ‘if’ and ‘when’ to secure in-home care for your parents. Sure, some circumstances are obvious—lack of mobility, a decidedly compromised mental state, or just the ability to tend to the basic tasks of living, but many times it comes down to an accumulation of events, missteps, and hard-to-ignore circumstances. The evidence eventually becomes too much to ignore.
At Mom’s Best Friend, we’ve been where you may possibly be now—asking the tough questions about your parents’ long-term care, wondering about next steps, and wanting nothing more than to do the absolute best thing on their behalf. With this in mind, we offer some general guidelines as to what to look for when trying to determine if your loved one needs a bit (or a lot) of in-home caregiving assistance.
It’s not an exhaustive list, but it is a starting point and offers some suggestions for what to possibly pay more attention to going forward. We suggest you review the list with your parent(s) in mind and give us a call to talk things through. We’ll work to answer your questions, suggest possible solutions, and relieve your fears and concerns. We’ll help equip you moving forward whether it be with suggestions regarding having these conversations with your family, establishing the level of care needed, or helping you every step of the way as you navigate finding the best possible caregiver for your loved one’s needs.
That said, here are some beginning questions to consider and areas to evaluate regarding your loved ones’ mental, physical, and emotional needs going forward
Does your parent have difficulty performing the basic daily activities such as:
- dressing
- bathing, grooming, toileting/continence
- preparing the simplest of meals such as heating items in the microwave or on the stove
- mobility in terms of getting around their house and moving from a seated position to standing
Has there been noticeable changes in their physical abilities or their general appearance?
- wearing the same clothing for days, especially if it is dirty or inappropriate for the season
- obvious poor personal hygiene likely due to lack of showering or bathing, possibly compounded by declining oral hygiene (strong, offensive breath, obvious tooth decay or gum disease)
- significant weight loss because of inability to buy and prepare meals
- bruises and cuts from problems with walking, falling, tripping, or failing to see obstacles in their path
Behavior and mental changes to take note of
- a marked loss of interest in activities, hobbies, even people, which were previously enjoyable
- difficulty keeping track of days of the week or acknowledgement of time
- significant (and oftentimes negative) changes in mood or outlook; a loss of finding the positive in any circumstance
- changes in sleep patterns or inability to maintain regular sleep hours either due to insomnia or excessive sleeping
Is there a noticeable difference in their household routine?
- has there been a change from tidiness to clutter or hoarding? Is the clutter such that it presents a fall threat or safety hazard (i.e. papers near a fireplace)?
- is the general cleanliness of their surroundings acceptable or cause for concern? No white glove expectations certainly, just basic levels of maintenance
- are bills paid regularly, finances monitored, and mail routinely gone through?
- is there spoiled or outdated food in either the refrigerator or pantry?
- is the yard maintained acceptably by neighborhood standards and for safety reasons?
- does their medication appear to be taken as prescribed and all refills up to date?
Finally, paying special attention to changes in cognition, memory, and judgment can be some of the hardest to pinpoint as senior adults can sometimes appear completely ‘with it’ and fully engaged while other times seeming to be more distant and removed from conversations and events happening right in front of them.
Make it a point to be especially mindful when looking for signs such as:
- confusion and agitation (sometimes over seemingly insignificant matters)
- forgetfulness to a worrisome level (i.e. forgetting to take prescriptions and adversely affecting their health)
- easily getting lost even when walking and driving to familiar places
- consistently exhibiting poor judgment (i.e. falling prey to appeals for money, internet or phone call scams, requests for personal information)
- inability to complete sentences or train of thought/forgetting the point of what they were saying/inability to find the appropriate word to convey their idea
- forgetfulness of names and people; not recognizing people out of context or understanding familial relationships and longtime friendships
Understanding the Two Big Caregiving Options
Despite the fact that home care and home health care are frequently used interchangeably, there is technically a vast difference between what the two options are expected to offer.
Home Care – Home Care is just what it says—care for elderly adults in their own home. These positions are sometimes classified as personal care, companion care, nonclinical care, and/or custodial care. Home care caregivers are not necessarily medically trained but are tremendously helpful to aging individuals that have begun to struggle with the activities of daily living (ADLs). Caregivers in these positions are best suited for individuals needing the support of someone for day-to-day basic activities, but not requiring medical attention.
Homemaker and companion care caregivers can typically provide:
- companionship and socialization
- meal planning and prep
- general housekeeping (including laundry and linens)
- grocery shopping and general errand running
- transportation
- assistance with getting around and reminders for taking prescription meds
An elevated level of care beyond household and/or companion care is usually referred to as a personal care aide or a home health aide. They can provide all of the services listed above plus additional assistance with more personal tasks such as:
- bathing or showering
- getting to and from the toilet or help with incontinence care
- brushing teeth
- dressing
Home Health Care – Providing Home Health Care usually requires the services of a formally trained, licensed and certified health care professional such as a registered nurse (RN), a licensed practice nurse (LPN), physical and/or occupational therapists, and even speech pathologists. Frequently, these services require the prescription of a physician and are a necessary part of rehab or ongoing treatment for seniors wanting to recover from surgery or injuries or receive services at home.
The services typically provided by home health care professionals likely include (but are definitely not limited to):
- monitoring vital signs (BP, pulse, O2, temperature, etc.)
- administering prescribed meds including IV treatments and injections
- wound/incision care and cleaning
Additionally, home health care professionals are frequently trained in assisting individuals with specific illnesses such as Parkinson’s Disease, Alzheimer’s Disease, ALS, and so on. Familiarity and experience with disease-specific conditions can be invaluable because home health care professionals can be particularly attentive to progressive symptoms, experienced in treatment protocol, and highly attuned to the older person’s overall well-being in relation to the disease. They can also provide prescribing doctors with tremendously valuable information and insights that neither the individual or visiting family members may recognize as disease-related symptoms.
Take Comfort
Helping families with in-home senior and elderly care is why we exist at Mom’s Best Friend—it is at the very heart of our company’s mission and our staff’s collective calling. We’re the first to recognize these decisions are not to be rushed, they require careful and thoughtful consideration, and they involve asking LOTS of questions that demand LOTS of industry understanding. We know every family’s needs are different and deserve kindness, compassion, and the consideration of many variables before a decision is made.
When you’re ready to consider moving forward with evaluating your loved one’s in-home caregiving needs, we stand ready to help and assist. We’ll walk alongside you, tend to the details, and streamline the process in every way possible.
We’re Mom’s Best Friend Senior and Elder Care and we’re among the top leaders in the Dallas/Fort Worth in-home caregiver community. We’ve won the awards and earned the reputation, but most importantly, when you’re ready to explore your in-home caregiver options, we’re here for you. Our services are available across the DFW Metroplex, in cities like Dallas, Highland Park, University Park, Plano, Frisco, Southlake, Flower Mound, Argyle, and more.
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